First and Foremost and Most Importantly even.. hah.

Happy Birthday Mom!!!!!!!!!! I loves ya!

Mom and Val! flew to NYC Saturday night. Val! finally decided to return home, and Mom decided at the last minute to come up for a visit. Luckily there were plenty of seats on the Houston flight so she had no problem getting on and even got a seat assignment right next to Vallers. Yesterday we spent waaay too much time in traffic and sitting in parking lots, but we did get to see some pretty flowering trees at the Brooklyn Botanic Gardens and spend some QT at mi casa.

Today is Mom's bday so we'll go out to dinner tonight - just not 100% sure of the details yet.

Now on to more concerning and somewhat saddening news. What decade, nay, what century are we living in again? Or better yet, what country? If you drink, and you have a myspace account, you're NOT FIT TO BE A TEACHER!!! Discuss!

'one of those magic, in between seasons'

It's almost like fall outside. I know spring can feel that way, but in Texas, it usually doesn't. As the day cascaded into darkness, Justin and I had finished supper and were walking home and the cool breezes and subtle sweet scents on the air truly reminded me of fall. It's wonderful. The difference being that there are pretty flowers blooming everywhere and the trees just starting to get their green buds. I love it! :)

A variety of thoughts are running through my head this morning.

I woke up depressed.
On my way to work this morning...
The vagabond within me took its sharp fingernail and scratched down the length of my chest, slicing an oozing, bloody line of flesh, wanting out. The sting sent my mind reeling into thoughts of waiting tables in a sunny seaside town in Italy, or roaming through vineyards in a chilly, misty French valley. I know the reality though - my thoughts are driven by my temporary unhappiness. And I felt a surge of anger and sadness and wondered, "when will I be happy? will I ever be happy? when can I just settle down and be happy with that?" I don't know why my thoughts have tendencies to go that way. Luckily, this morning, I was able to ground my concerns and root them in real problems rather than my ephemeral musings.

I believe the truth of my concern is more in relation to my future, to my goals. Will I ever get my MBA? When? I definitely saw that coming before I turned 30, but now, frighteningly enough, that age is staring me in the face like a pistol during an ill-fated game of Russian roulette. Shit. Also, what about the Scholarship fund I want to start? That I've been wanting to start since my sister graduated from college 4 years ago? At what point do I decide I can do things rather than my standard I don't know how therefore I can't? Hmm...

I feel like my career is lacking a sense of fulfillment that I get from actually helping people. Yes, that is what made me feel *so* good about being a flight attendant. First of all, I was very good at it, and secondly, I helped people and made people happy. I need that sort of thing in my life. That's on my list of "things to figure out."

Another thing I've discovered that is bothering me today is the shooting in Virginia. See, the whole incident is depressing, but what gets to me the most is that the shooter was a senior at Virginia Tech. Now, I know this case is extreme, but I really feel that the senior year of college, for most people, is incredibly difficult. You ask yourself who you are, what you're doing, what will happen after graduation. I understand that high school is like this for a lot of people as well. You come to a crossroads in your life. A lot of people (myself included) are not or were not prepared for this. Your whole life, until that point, is about school. Then what? I feel like our society does an atrocious job preparing young people for the "what now? what's next? what the hell!?" reality of life after education. I know it was a very difficult time for me (and career choices, etc, definitely haven't been easy for me), for Val! and for Belinda. It makes me wonder if there is something that can be done to step in to show young people that there really is something out there after college.

I am going to throw that idea to our community relations department and see if they think there is any sort of new program we can work on. I don't have much faith in people wanting to take on gigantic, new projects though. Especially if they don't mean bringing in more revenue.


I think I am finished with my rant for now. :)

Sheila's Wedding

My trip home and to Sheila's Wedding!!! - April 2007

What can I say? Sheila's wedding was absolutely beautiful, as was she. The location was gorgeous - far better in person than in the photographs on their website, the food (both hors d'oeuvres and main course) was delicious, and the exit of the bride and groom was breathtaking. Yes, I remember it being breathtaking even though I was plastered at the time. I also caught the bouquet! The only thing I wish had been more fun was the music at the reception. I didn't get to dance much, which is huge for me. However, we did get a huge group up for the Chicken Dance, even though Sheila refused and Justin (groom) was appalled. Hmph! In my best hick voice, "It ain't a weddin' without the chickin' dance!"

I'll get photos up ASAP.

Sheila's Wedding Day

It's Sheila's wedding day and I am stressed like a biatch. Justin and I got up at 8 AM and had to go get another rental car ($30 per day less than our original one), grab breakfast, then head to the Mercury Hall (where Sheila and Justin Roan are getting married) to help decorate. Came back to the hotel, showered, dressed, and called around to find out if I could get my hair done somewhere. I could, but nothing was jiving with me. One place didn't use extensions, one place didn't have a stylist available, and another place said the styles with extensions was a 6 hour ordeal. So now I think I'll just deal with it myself, especially since the wind gusts are 20 - 30 mph - seems like a waist of time and money to have someone else do it. I want to go to the mall and get hair accessories that match my dress and I need to get my nails done. All before 4 pm! It's 12:30 pm now. Eeep!!!!!

Finally - photos from Washington D.C. - March 2007

Washington D.C. - March 2007

There is so much I can say, but I am tired. It is late, and my captions say enough. I am mucho sorry it's taken almost a month to get these photos up! But you should be able to take your time going through them as there are more than 120 here! I'll try my best to get others from the next couple weekends up soon.

And maybe some day I will be reflective and write something! :) Thanks for your post Sheila. I am glad to know (and surprised!) that you checked out my page.

Addendum, I should know what B6 is huh? :(

I haven't written in a long time

I feel guilty that I haven't. There have been moments of inspiration that I've experience - whether walking to work, storming around the office, or contemplating my present situation in life, but at none of these points have I been near a computer. Not only that, but I feel guilty writing a blog entry at work. I told myself I'd overcome that today.

Now I feel stressed and uninspired. Go figure.

I have to add photos from Washington D.C. (March 10th?), photos from our trip to the Catskills/Hunter Mountain with Dao, Rob, and Val! (March 17th), and photos from our trip to Sarasota (March 31st).

I have decided that I don't get enough out of weekend trips because I am running around too much of the time trying to do/see everything. I feel like I should take a step back, slow down the pace, and focus on one or two things instead of ten. That way I will be able to absorb and reflect on a situation. Afterall, life isn't just about "go go go" - it is about being caught up in a moment and reflecting on that moment. For me that has always meant writing. It isn't that I can't be inspired, it's that I don't give myself the time to process things and express them. That's my goal for the next trip I take. We'll see how it works out.

But - more photos coming soon, my non-existant readers. ;)